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Let’s get straight to it:
If you’re a working mom in your 40s or 50s and you feel exhausted 97% of the time, nothing is wrong with you.
You’re not lazy.
You’re not “unmotivated.”
You’re not failing.
You’re simply living a life that would drain a professional athlete — minus the massage therapists, private chefs, and personal sleep coaches.
And while “self-care” is a cute idea, you can’t exactly meditate your way out of a schedule that’s basically a full-time job stacked on another full-time job stacked on hormonal chaos.
So let’s talk about why you’re tired — and more importantly, what you can actually do about it.
Reason 1: Hormones Are Doing the Cha-Cha SlideStarting as early as your late 30s, estrogen and progesterone start declining. Testosterone too.
This hormonal shift can cause:

• Low energy
• Sleep disruption
• Mood swings
• Weight gain
• Hot flashes
• Increased stress response
  
• Anxiety . . . ALL the anxiety

A study published in Menopause found that up to 85% of women experience significant fatigue during perimenopause (Kravitz et al., 2018).
So no, you're not imagining it — your hormones are sabotaging you harder than your toddler before school picture day.
Reason 2: Chronic Stress Is Draining Your BatteryWorking moms carry what researchers call “the mental load.” Look, I get it. I'm a stress cadet, too. And I'm not even a mom.

It’s the invisible to-do list running in your head 24/7:
Who needs lunch money?
Did I send that email?
What’s for dinner?
Do we have clean towels?
Did the dog take his heartworm pill?
Research from the American Psychological Association shows that mothers who work outside the home report higher daily stress levels than any other demographic (APA, 2022).
Chronic stress increases cortisol — the hormone responsible for:

• Fatigue
• Belly fat
• Sugar cravings
• Irritability
• Difficulty sleeping

So yes, stress literally makes you tired and makes it harder to lose weight. Fun!

Reason 3: Your Sleep Has Left the ChatBetween hormones, kids, stress, and Netflix (“just one more episode of Mad Men), sleep takes a hit.
Studies show that women in midlife experience more fragmented sleep and a decline in REM quality, which affects recovery, energy, and cognitive performance (Baker et al., 2019).
Translation:
You may be lying in bed for 8 hours, but you are not sleeping for 8 hours. Let's not forget about the 3am wake ups, either.

Reason 4: You're Undereating Protein & Overrunning on CoffeeLow protein = low muscle mass = low metabolism = low energy.
Research shows women over 40 need at least 0.7–1.0g of protein per pound of body weight to maintain muscle (Phillips et al., 2016).
Meanwhile, coffee is giving you borrowed energy that you’re eventually repaying with interest like a bad credit card.

Reason 5: You Move Less Than You Think — Through No Fault of Your OwnSitting at a desk all day drains energy.
Driving drains energy.
Repetitive daily tasks drain energy.
Not to mention… existing.
Studies show sedentary behavior increases fatigue by reducing circulation, oxygen flow, and dopamine — your “feel-good” neurotransmitter (Puetz et al., 2006).

Okay But… What Actually Helps?Here’s what improves midlife fatigue — backed by research and absolutely doable for busy moms.
1. Strength Training 2–3 Times a WeekIt boosts energy, metabolism, hormone balance, bone density, and mood.
It’s basically a miracle drug.
(Source: National Strength and Conditioning Association, 2020)
Even 10–15 minutes counts. In the Ascend Mobile App, we have actually built you out a 15 minute workout for those of you that just can't seem to stop.
2. Increase Protein IntakeProtein stabilizes blood sugar, improves energy, and preserves lean muscle.
Aim for 25–35g per meal.
3. Walk More Throughout the DayYou don’t need 10,000 steps.
Just adding short walks increases energy significantly.
A study from the University of Georgia found exercise increased energy by 65% and decreased fatigue by 49% (Puetz et al., 2006).
4. Address Hormones with Your DoctorIf fatigue is constant and overwhelming, ask for:

• Estrogen
• Progesterone
• Testosterone
• Thyroid panel
• Vitamin D
• Iron

Fatigue is often a symptom — not a character flaw.
5. Use Programs That Remove Decision FatigueWhen you're tired, you need simple, structured,.no-thinking-required fitness.
That’s exactly why programs like Ascend exist.
Inside the app, you get:

• Prebuilt strength programs
• Workouts for busy schedules
• 15-minute options
• No guessing
• No planning
• No guilt

Perfect for the “I’m tired but still want to feel human” mom.
Final ThoughtsIf you're exhausted, the solution isn’t to “try harder.”
It’s to support your body through:

• Smarter training
• More protein
• Hormonal awareness
• Stress reduction
• Better sleep habits
• And programs built for REAL women with REAL responsibilities

You deserve energy.
You deserve strength.
And no — being tired all the time is not normal.

Sources

• American Psychological Association. Stress in America Report, 2022.
• Baker FC, et al. “Sleep and Women’s Health Across the Lifespan.” Sleep Medicine Clinics, 2019.
• Kravitz, A. N., et al. Menopause, 2018.
• Phillips SM, et al. “Protein Requirements and Muscle Health.” Applied Physiology, Nutrition, and Metabolism, 2016.
• Puetz TW, et al. "Exercise and Fatigue Reduction." Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 2006.
• National Strength and Conditioning Association (NSCA), 2020.

The holidays are here. . . family gatherings, office parties, travel, cookies, casseroles, late nights… and the pressure of “I’ll just start over in January” starts creeping in.

If you’re a woman who’s spent years bouncing between dieting hard and then regaining everything (and more), this season can feel stressful. You want to enjoy it, but you also don’t want to undo all the progress you’ve made this year.
Here’s the good news:

You don’t need to choose between enjoying the holidays and staying consistent with your health.

And you absolutely don’t need to punish yourself with restrictions just because you’re eating differently this month.
Below are five simple, sustainable strategies to help you stay on track, feel good, and roll into the New Year with confidence, not guilt or overwhelm.


1. Shift from “all or nothing” to “just enough”
The holiday season often triggers an extreme mindset:

• “I already messed up at the party… might as well restart in January.”
• “If I can’t do everything perfectly, why even try?”
  
  

But sustainable fat loss comes from doing just enough to keep your routine alive, not perfect.
Ask yourself daily:
“What is the bare minimum I can do today to support my goals?”

For most women, that looks like:

• Drink your water
• Hit a protein target
• Stay active 10–20 minutes
• Get to bed at a reasonable time

Not perfect, just consistent.



2. Prioritize protein at every holiday meal
Holiday foods are usually carb-loaded and delicious (yes, enjoy them!).

But adding protein:

• Keeps you fuller
• Stabilizes energy
• Prevents overeating later
• Helps maintain muscle and metabolism during a busy season
  
  

Simple protein additions:

• Add eggs or Greek yogurt at breakfast
• Pick turkey, ham, or roast at dinner
• Keep protein shakes or bars for busy days
• Add cottage cheese, deli meat, or chicken to snacks
  
  

This one tweak alone keeps many women from spiraling into holiday overeating.


3. Keep movement simple, short, and doable

You do not need to “make up for” holiday food with workouts.

But movement does help with:

• Stress
• Digestion
• Energy
• Appetite regulation
• Mood and motivation
  
  
  

If you’re traveling or busy, try:

• 10–15 minute strength circuits
• Bodyweight workouts
• Daily walks
• Your Phoenix Rising training app routines
  
  

A little movement keeps your identity intact:
“I’m someone who takes care of myself, even during the holidays.”


4. Set boundaries around holiday stress (yes, this counts as fat loss work)

So many women think fat loss is just a calorie deficit…
But stress, sleep, and emotional overload impact your hormones, cravings, and willpower.
Your December boundaries might look like:

• Saying no to extra obligations
• Leaving gatherings early
• Asking for help instead of doing everything yourself
• Creating 5 minutes of quiet morning space
• Communicating with your spouse or kids about your needs
  
  

Healthy boundaries = healthier choices.

5. Give yourself permission to enjoy the season—without guilt

Guilt doesn’t burn calories.
Shame doesn’t build muscle.

And restriction only leads to binging later.
You can enjoy treats, parties, and rest while still staying aligned with your long-term goals.

Here’s the mindset shift I teach all my Phoenix Rising clients:
“One day doesn’t undo the work you’ve done. But quitting because you feel guilty does.”

Give yourself permission to enjoy the season and stay connected to your goals.
That balance is what keeps women from starting over every January.


Final Thoughts: Start the New Year already moving forward—not starting from zero

Imagine this:
You wake up on January 1st… not bloated, exhausted, guilty, or ready to punish yourself… but proud.
Because you didn’t quit.
You navigated the season with intention, not perfection.
That is sustainable fat loss.
That is lifestyle change.
That is where real transformation begins.


Want support through the holidays and into the New Year?
This is the time of year when most women fall off.
But you don’t have to go through it alone.

If you want a coach who helps you build strong habits, stay consistent, and finally break the cycle of losing and regaining. This is exactly what I do inside Phoenix Rising and Kayli Montoya Fitness.

👉 Book a free discovery call here to get started.
Let’s make this the last year you start over.

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